Friday, June 1, 2012

Full Heart

Today was the last day of school. The parent paparazzi was in full force today. 

If you know me, you know that I've never dealt well with transitions. Today marks the end of my second year teaching. Two of those two years have been spent with the same children. This fact made the day even more difficult. I've had these children for 8 hours a day for 360 days. It is weird because I look forward to summer break all year, and now it's here and all day I found myself dreading the end.

The uncertainty of beginnings and ends are always dreadful for me. I will choose to reside in the middle. Middles are safe and predictable. I had more students cry today than I had anticipated. Part of me wanted to tell them to save their tears for middle school, they'd need them there. However, I didn't want to be pessimistic, but I know we can all agree, those are some difficult years. In all honesty, they're amazing kids, and I have no doubt that they'll accomplish many amazing things. Their insight and creativity amazes me, and I love to see them learn and grow.

I received the posted letter from a student and it made my heart so incredibly full that I thought it would burst. I haven't mentioned motherhood or parenting to my students at all,  so it means so much to hear that I will be a good mommy from a student. My students are the closest thing to a child that I have right now. I hope that I have been nurturing and kind when needed, as well as stern and strict when necessary. I pray that they always knew that my classroom  was a safe place to make a mistake. It is my highest intention that they will walk away from this year having learned the importance of kindness. I hope that they've grown in their confidence, security, and developed a lifelong sense of curiosity.

I've been a bit weepy all afternoon. I'm grateful that I'll have more time to get to working on the completion of our dossier now that things have slowed down.

I'm learning that some of the most significant and integral parts of our existence happen in the beginnings and ends of our life chapters. I think I'll marinate on that for a bit.

When It comes down to it, I want nothing more than to be a part of the parent paparazzi.

1 comment:

  1. Kate
    I am horrible at transitions as well!!! I like what you said about "the most significant and integral parts of our existence happens in the beginnings and ends of our life chapters" It makes sense to feel anxious or unsettled about these 'large' moments (beginnings and ends) they make life SO WORTH IT!! I love you and I love your heart!